I feel bad for being gone so long. I'm sorry loyal follower(s). I've sorta had things going on... it happens, and to be totally cliche, c'est la vie or c'est ma vie however you wish to put it... Anywhizzle, I've decided to compile a list of all the things I hear people complain about at work just to let people know about what cashiers, baggers, and stockers really really hate (and hopefully someone out there will learn a lesson or two about etiquette).
1) I am a human being. I am not to be ignored. When I ask you how you are doing, is it so hard to force out a little "fine"?
2) We do not control the prices. Ever.
3) If you do not have your loyalty card, please do not get angry with us when your discounts come off. We always give you options to replace it.
4) (This is a quote from an unnamed source.) "I hate it when people leave random miscellaneous items on the shelves. I don't think they realize that [stockers] have to go back and put them in the right spot, which just makes our jobs harder."
5) When we ask you to donate money to a cause, it's because we are required to. Don't kill the messenger.
6) Sometimes we are shorthanded at the front end. No, you do not have to bag your own groceries. No, it is not our fault that whoever made the schedule didn't anticipate the rush of people.
7) When the person from a self check-out asks you if you would like to check out there to avoid the wait, you have the right to say "no". Do not bite our heads off because you don't like it. It's our job to ask.
8) Most of us make minimum wage. So we may not ask for it but when we're outside in the pouring rain or blazing heat or twenty degree weather, it would be nice to get a little tip for our trouble. We know you have money, we saw you rummaging through your wallet. And you just spent thirty dollars on dog food. But you can't spare a buck for a kid at a grocery store?
9) Don't come through lines, go to the pharmacy, or order at the deli while you're talking on your cell phone. For one, it's rude, and for another you usually get your order wrong. Want to finish the convo with your ex? Go ahead, we'll wait.
10) During the holidays, we have to say "Happy Holidays" (with a few notable exceptions at our store because a few feel they're above political correctness and I feel no need to stop them). Please don't snap at us that it's Christmas.
11) We love when people talk to us like we're intelligent human beings. You'd be surprised by how much better quality service you'd get if you just talked with us at the beginning of the order.
12) Hate to say it, but we remember the polite regulars. And we certainly remember the rude ones.
13) I am an intelligent being. I promise I won't put your eggs under the dog food.
14) If you come in at ten-thirty at night, we will serve you, but don't expect the full package or an actual check lane.
15) Make life a little easier for everyone; if you are in a group buying alcohol, have everyone bring their IDs. We can't sell it to you otherwise. And if you try to be clever and go through a different line, believe it or not, it's our job to call that person and have them refuse service.
16) We always have managers on call. But they have jobs too.
17) If we say we cannot lower the price on something perishable (i.e. flowers, meat, deli items) we really mean it.
18) If your bagger has a brace on their arm, chances are they won't be too helpful picking up your six fifty pound bags of dog food.
19) A lot of us love your kids. Don't worry, they can't break anything.
20) You know that attendant at self check out that you were rude to? Yeah, she'll be right back...as soon as she finishes talking to a friend.
21) We do not care if you think that a certain someone in front of you is ridiculous for having a check in an express lane. Similarly, we don't care what you think about the person behind you.
22) If we have not started your order yet, it's probably for a reason. Do not proceed to stick your money, card, or loyalty card in our face. One day, we may bite.
23) Use common sense when dealing with item prices. The rule of thumb is if it seems too good to be true, it probably is.
24) Girls, we are not looking at your boyfriends, husbands, or significant others. Boys, we are not looking at your wives, girlfriends, or S.O.'s. CALM DOWN.
25) When we call someone asking for the code of a produce object (it usually sounds like "Hey, RANDOMCHECKERHERE, what's parsnips?") we don't want the code. Sorry, but we hate it when you go "It's forty-nine cents..." it doesn't help. (Thanks, this one was from one of my friends at a well-known grocery chain.)
And finally...
26) No one wants to work on the holidays. Or on sale days. We realize you've been packed into a store full of bodies, but we've been doing it for eight hours.
So, I'm sorry, but maybe if anyone out there reading this they'll think "Huh, maybe I shouldn't yell at this cashier, or maybe organize my coupons, or put this frosting back where it belongs..." Anyway, sorry...
xoxo
